Home For The Holidays: Blogmas Day 2

Hello today (comment down below if you know what that’s from)! This post I am bringing to you a guide to your family members. Lets be honest, sometimes you would rather walk a mile of broken glass than have to answer to your relatives embarrassing questions and comments. So, to help y’all out, I’m going to give you a guide to the most frequently found relatives! I hope you enjoy and let’s get into it!

The Snobby Cousin:

Now, I think that each and every one of us has a relative, cousin or not, that acts just the tiniest bit snobby. Luckily for me, I was blessed without one of those. But that can’t stop me from helping a fellow blogger out! Chances are, this person will eavesdrop on conversations – then join in on them, completely interrupt you – then bring all of the attention to themselves, and lastly, act like everything revolves around them.

When They Eavesdrop On Your Conversations: Simply inform them that you were having a conversation, and ask them to come back later if they want to talk. Or, if you don’t want to confront them in front of people, politely excuse your self and the snob, then tell them that you didn’t appreciate that they cut in on your conversation.

When They Completely Interrupt You: Listen politely to what they have to say, then continue talking about the subject. If they try to interrupt you again, just keep talking. They will eventually get the message that you want them to stop interrupting you. Feeling extra bold? If they try to interrupt, say “I’m sorry, did you want to interrupt me again?”. That will definitely get them to stop, but it might also get you in trouble. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

When They Act Like Everything Revolves Around Them: This might sound kind of horrible, but a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do! Ask the snob a question that you know will relate to a yourself or another family member, and prompt them to tell the story. If you really need to escape the horror though, excuse your self to the washroom and take a minute to your self. Easy as pie!

The One-Upping Sibling:

If you have a sibling that goes with you to a family event, the older people there will probably try and get you in the same room at some point. Don’t get me wrong: Siblings are the best (remember Garry, Sabah, Laarni?), but they sometimes feel the need to start the battle of the best. So sometimes they: one-up everything you say – even if they have to lie to do so, and try to cut down your success.

When They One-Up Your Every Word: Brush it off! They will get the point, especially if they are younger than you that either two things will happen: They will run out of ideas, or make thing up that are completely un-realistic. But let’s say that they are really good with convincing people, subtly call them out. Ask questions that relate to the subject, but will be sure to make them uncomfortable.

When They Cut Down Your Success: As painful as this might be to your pride, try to get your mom. She’ll tell the story right, maybe even jazz it up a bit! But it you don’t feel the need to call for help, have prepared pictures on your phone, or somewhere that is easily accessible, to prove your sibling wrong. For example, they say that your last semesters report card was all under 70% (when it wasn’t), play the victim! Say that you weren’t proud, but that you could show them a picture.  Hint: Show it to them even if they say no.

The Embarrassing Grandma:

Again, I was blessed by not having one of these, but some people do. Everyone loves taking family pictures, so you and grandma are bound to sit down together at some point. She will usually: Tell embarrassing stories about you as a child – no matter whose listening, show your old baby pictures (which your sure you burned years ago) and, gasp! Maybe pinch your cheeks!

When They Tell Embarrassing Stories: Laugh along, but make sure that you have either a great story thats more resent (about you) or an embarrassing story about grandma herself! If, however, people start to tease you about that one story, have one about them too! Example:

Relative- “Hey there, I hope you can [reference to a story here]!” *laughs at his own joke*

You- “I’m sure I will (smile sweetly), I just hope that you [Make reference to one of their embarrassing moments]!”

When They Start To Show Your Old Photos: Say that you would(n’t) love to stick around to see more, but that you were supposed to help with dinner clean-up. Then, actually do the job you said that you had. At least you won’t have to be laughed at over those old pictures! After you finished the job you supposedly had, sneak off to another room. Hint: If your in with the kids, then no one will bother you, especially if you”busy” with looking after everyone. Not.

When They Pinch Your Cheeks: Say “Grandma, you don’t need to keep checking my blush-color! I’m already wearing makeup!” Now, of course this only works if you wear makeup, but i’m sure you could come up with some thing else like, “I know you want me to start wearing makeup, Grandma, but I don’t want to. Now please stop making it look like I’m wearing blush!” Then make your exit girl!

The Rude Relative:

Yet again, I don’t have one of these. But once again, I just want to help you out. This relative will probably make rude comments about your body (like “Oh! You gained the freshmen fifteen and your not even in university!”), make rude comments about any food thats out (“Eeeewww! Did these come straight out of a dumpster?”) and be un-grateful for any gifts received. Though in my opinion, if they are that rude, they should be getting coal instead.

When They Make Fun Of You Or Someone Else: Stick up for yourself/them, woman! just because this grinch of a family member doesn’t feel the need to be nice, don’t just stand there! Make sure they know that the comment didn’t get to you, or that it was completely rude to say. For more effect, get some green m&m’s and say this: “Would you like a grinch pill (offer green m&m’s)? Because you could really use a dose of… nice.” Again, don’t say I didn’t warn you if this gets you in trouble.

When They Comment On The Food: State that you absolutely love it (only if you do, of course) and ask he person who put so much effort into it for the recipe! If you didn’t love it or are just to full, say that it’s probably wonderful, but your going to pop if you eat another thing. If you can’t think of anything, say that [relatives name here] just isn’t a fan of whatever the food is. Even if it means backing up the Rude Relative, it will make the chef feel better.

When They Are Un-Grateful For Gifts: Call them out! Tell them, in front of every one, that the gift that the Rude Relative had a lot of thought behind it. Just say: “[Relatives name]! That gift was something that someone picked out for you, personally! It is very thoughtful, and the fact that you don’t appreciate the thought and the money spent on this is un-grateful” Preach! Once again, if you prefer to be alone while you confront the person, excuse your selves and then preach your heart out!

The Following Kid:

This kid doesn’t even have to be related to you to have an obsession with you. This kid can also be found in a lot of gatherings with distant family, or with family friends whom your not particularly close with. This kid will generally: follow you EVERYWHERE! – even if it means waiting outside the bathroom for you. They also, do/say/eat the same exact thing as you and worst of all, think that you love them hanging around as much as they do.

When They Follow You Everywhere: It’s tricky to try and let a kid down easy, especially when there is lot’s of people around to hear if there is a meltdown. The only thing that I can think of is this: get the Following Kid busy with their favourite thing, then say that your going to see some other people quickly. Tell them to keep playing because you’ll be back “soon” and to play with other kids. If your like me, and hate having to sneakily get out of something, tell the child that you would like to go see your family, and bring the child to their family. Honestly, if all else fails, comment on this post when you feel the need to escape.

When They Copy Your Every Move: Picture this: it’s a serve yourself dinner, so you take a serving of all your favourite things. When you go and sit down, the Following Kid is sitting right beside you, with the exact same meal. As a test, you start to drum your fingers on the table. So do they. You sit up straiter. So do they. There is only one way out of this situation, my friend. You have to tell them. Say something like: “[Following Kids Name], I noticed that you have been copying me. Do you think we could maybe play a different game instead of copy-cat?” If they just repeat back to you what you said, find a retreat. There is generally a room where it’s only adults, so use that as a refuge (even if your not an adult).

When They Think That You Also Love Being Followed: Break it to them gently that you don’t, indeed, think that being followed is fun. Here

Following Kid: “Don’t you love playing with me all the time? Cause’ I sure do!”

You: “Well, it has been very fun, but I’m not sure that I like being followed around anymore”

Following Kid: “Oh. (Sad look). But I thought we are having fun”

You: “Maybe we just take a little break from each other? So that I don’t get bored of you, and you don’t get bored with me. You know, [insert sibling/cousins name] LOVES to play, and they even told me that they thought you were cool. How ’bout you play with them?”

Following Kid: “Okay!” Problem solved. Now you have the rest of the evening to yourself!

And there you have it, ladies and gents! Blogmas day two! Just a little disclaimer, don’t try to stereotype your relatives! They love you, and deep down, you love them. However, that doesn’t mean that they can’t get on your nerves. Todays question-of-the-post is: Did I miss any relatives? If so, comment your advice down below and help our community out! Remember that you are amazing! -GRACEFUL

 

 

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